Saturday, October 16, 2010
Alone? Yes. Lonely? No.
I have four different things I want to talk about tonight, but I think I'll just focus on one. Maybe I'll get another one in there. We'll see how this goes.
My maids were here today and I guess as it's a regular thing now their curiosity about me has been raised. I got the barrage of usual questions that I get, along with their self-imposed judgments of my answers. Nothing bad, just the typical reactions I get. It's utterly mind-blowing to most that a woman lives alone in a house. I don't know why that it doesn't remotely strike me as odd, but it sure does most other women. Some men, but mostly women. The one maid out and out said, it must be so lonely, especially during the holidays... I just let it drop, but I want to tell everyone. "You do not KNOW what lonely is, until you are with the wrong person." Never in my life have I ever been so lonely as I was married to my husband. That was total and utter desolation. Give me the rest of my life on this Earth completely alone yet promise me I'll never feel THAT way again and I'll say "Done and done". Because, no. I do not feel lonely. I yearn for a soulmate, yes. I do not however feel lonely. As fun as most of you seem to think I am, well I think I am too times 10. I enjoy and thrive on being alone with myself. Having said that, it could always be better. I choose not to settle for mediocre company just to not be "alone". The term "suffer fools" comes to mind. It's taxing to me to have people around who do not get me. So a solitary life for me, until my soulmate and I can be together.
I should show this post to everyone going forward so they can all stop asking. I know it's out of care and concern, but it gets old. :)