Saturday, December 31, 2016
In 2014, I finally found what/who I had been looking for. While I knew it then, I did not KNOW it then. That knowing has evolved and developed over the last 3 years, but this year it saw a terrific leap forward to something I only dreamed I would get to experience. Finding the right partner for you when you are not like the others is a game-changer. Yes. People usually like me, or are intrigued by me even if they find me off-putting for their tastes. But someone GETTING you. Seeing you and all your flaws and saying, "Carla, you are the one." That's rocketed me into so much personal growth and reflection that I'm truly changed by it.
Everything in my life is different now on the inside. Soon the outward manifestations will show to those in my life. 2017 will see me moving cross-country yet again. This time I'm not running from a man, to a man, I'm blissfully and calming going with THEE man. The man who I want to share the rest of my life with. The man I want to share my hopes and dreams with. The man I want to have children with if we are so blessed. The man that I have no back-up plans with that small (or great) reservation in the back of my mind and heart, "What if it all goes wrong?" That's always been there with everyone else. That was there the first 2/3 of this relationship and nearly caused us to lose everything. I couldn't believe he was real. I couldn't believe he could love. That he could see all the heartache/heartbreak, all the damage, and say, "Yeah, You Carla, I choose this." He finally got it through to me - this is real. The struggles I have faced this year that he made seem like nothing would have broken down any of my prior relationships. We have gotten stronger and stronger.
This post is not a gloating session. I don't mean for it to be. I mean for it to give you courage and inspiration if you are feeling all alone. All alone whether your are will someone or not. There can be a real healing from connecting with someone like I have with Jared. So, if you think you have that with someone or you KNOW you do - don't let that go!! This is a precious gift. If you don't have it, I believe you can attract it to you. I truly do. I was slowly but surely calling Jared into my life. I just didn't see it till he was there.
Get really, really clear on what you want and only dwell on that. Don't sit with what you don't want. Only focus on good feelings. I believe you will reveal your true heart's desire.
Wishing you all the best in 2017!! (and I really will try to get back to posting)