Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Another Bad Year Here

I woke up so happy that December was here. Also relieved that a stinkin' Tuesday went by without a cat dying. Tuesdays are officially not my favorite now. As I thought about the new year coming I said, "This has been a bad year." Then I thought about it for second and followed up with, "Every year here has been a bad year." Then I thought that surly that wasn't the case, but it's the truth. I'm not blaming the location, but I marvel at how it's almost as though fate has completely conspired against me with a few notable exceptions that I can easily count on one hand.

Now I know that sounds pessimistic. Perhaps it is, but I feel I'm an optimist. I always believe things will be better. I'm just really ready for that belief to be validated again. Used to be that it was all the time. Yes, bad things would happen back home, but not with the certainty and severity of the things that have happened to me here. Plus there were pretty steady bright spots in my life back home. Perhaps it was because I was in love. Maybe that made all the difference. Maybe just the fact that I lost my love is what makes it seem that every thing else is so terrible.

Regardless, I truly hope that 2011 brings some awesomeness to counter-balance 2008, 2009, and 2010. I guess that's a TALL order for 2011. I hope that it will deliver though. :)

Ohhhh, finally found the RIGHT lyrics for "Cylons". Apparently a lot of lyrics sites can't hear the words correctly because they have them quite wrong.

I already caused, apparently normal
when you smiled and slowed
but I have important work to carry (sort of speak)
I rarely never hold a job I never finish my work
I'm an affable bomb in this swamp
when hiding is organized, pose, both mellow jerk

you were like an angel
when I first met you
made me feel so good inside
showed me what I can do

it was so beautiful then
we were as one
but now I feel, baby
like something's gone

why don't I love you like I used to do, oh baby, baby x2

It's been so long now
between you and me
I thought I wanted to be part of you
now I want to be free

why don't I love you like I used to do, oh baby, baby
why don't you love me like I want you to, oh baby, my baby

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