Wednesday, July 21, 2010

"James, I Can't Believe This Is Happening..."

Neither can I, James. I really cannot believe that this ludicrous series thrived all these years.

The Acting -- ABYSMAL

The Plots -- Preposterous

The Lead -- Insouciant (which normally I love in men, but not these guys)

The Women -- Bipolar (not maniac/low but hopelessly stupid/rather sharp)

The Gadgets -- Cool for the time

The Cars -- Well here the series does not disappoint

The Villains -- Please

The Henchmen -- Laughable

The Lairs -- Really?

The Open Credits Scene -- Hand to God one of the "Model's" hands were a man's and a NASTY man's hands. I've never seen a man with such gnarled hands.

The End Credits -- Always threatening you with the next one. Did Broccolli have dirty pics of the studio owner's daughter or something? How did this go on????

So I'm "watching" "The Man with the Golden Gun". Tiny dude from "Fantasy Island" is in it. His name -- Nick Nack. Yeah, I'd kill myself too. Christopher Lee/James Bond had GREY third nipples in this one. That will NEVER be erased from my mind. NEVER!!!!! The sentence in the subject was uttered by the trollop du jour as she was about to be "seduced" but then got kicked out of bed when a trollop with more relevant intel comes to the door. He's a class act. Where can I cash in my self-esteem and get some of that scary-great action?

I've got another 20-25yrs of this dreck to go, but I am so curious to see if I'll like the more current ones. I thought I did when I saw them, but I was younger then. My tastes have vastly changed the last few years.

I'm just glad I have Connery out of the way. I like my Connery as an SNL parody of Connery.

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