Monday, January 25, 2010

Mixed Bag of Emotions Today

One of those need-to-take-a-deep-breath-and-let-it-out days.

I start off tired because these flipping cats namely Zoe & Evil will NOT let me sleep from 2-3a.m. and on. I'm really getting tired of this. I finally have a total sanctuary and these cat bastards are destroying it. Oh well, we know I love them.

I see I got Review of the Day for Perla's and that made me all giddy because YES that really pushes my happy buttons.

I get out the door in ample time and then I see my car windows are all iced over. I forgot about this with having a garage. So I finally get that sorted (i need to get a scraper thingy) and get to work.

Morning is great and then one of the girls brings in the cutest puppy who has a hurt leg. She and another girl take it to the vet and while they are gone I decide that I'm going to take it home when they bring it back. They don't bring her back. She had to be put down. So that sucks. I know I didn't need a dog, but she was a special one. Oh well.

Then a friend tells me their grandfather is hurt and in a coma and won't make it. So I'm feeling like crap for her and then of course I get to worrying about Grandfather who has surgery next week. Today is his and GM's 58th anniversary. So I get to thinking about THAT whole thing. Will I ever have that again? How do you go from being in a relationship your entire adult life to alone for two solid years? Is this what my life is to be? I mean maybe it is. I don't know. Maybe there isn't anyone out there for me. I'm usually okay with this stuff, but on the big days (usually my former big days) it hits and tomorrow is ex-husband's birthday so it's hitting a little bit again. Not that I want him, far from it. Just what I was misled to believe we had.

Anyway, blah blah blah. These are the circles that I find in the windmills of my twisted little mind.

But my house is lovely, I have my health, my friends, and my family so I am truly blessed as it is. Just have to keep reminding myself of that.

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